When you born, your parents, society give you so much of restriction.
How to eat, What to wear, How to behave, When to come back home, What not to consume, Whom to not meet etc etc.
I am sure you never liked them.
But have you ever imagined, ” why do they do that ?”
Let me tell you the answer!
Boundaries protect us.
Till some extent our parants manage to put these norms on us but once we get older the first thing we do is snatch our freedom.
We do things that are prohibited and soon or later we realise that many restrictions are actually good for us.
Because, as human we are vulnerable at certain extent and all the boundaries is just before that.
When to transcend.
But, There are some boundaries tries to capture with mindset. That is where you take stand and push the so called social norm to prove that there is a better life beyond it.
Those are the boundaries you need to push.
Often, when we dont have boundaries we stuck in situations that is beyond right or wrong. You feel nothing but ignorant there you realise the value of a boundry.
The story
When mama moved to bangalore, I can imagine how fun it was for her to spend time with other guys.
Today, Mama is not with me.
I hate her like anything, especially because of the threatening call that I have got from Dulip.
If she could have put boundaries for herself then I would not have to deal with this level of mess in my life.
Yet,
I am feeling gratitude about she being one of the best part of my life.
She had been with me in the most amazing phase of my life, which is the transformation from an ignorant kid to an ignorant man.
I was messed up but today I am most sorted.
Intellectually, I have grown so far and the knowledge that I was giving to her during her confusion were the masterclass.
Every tiny things happened between us always brought us more closer to each other to make the perfect relationship.
A person like me stopped looking at another girl, stopped flirting, reduced anger and started staying happy, and positive…
The credit I will keep to me only. Yet, there was a small amount of initial contribution there from her side.
After coming to bangalore also I could feel the same spark, just because I was upset about some fact, I could not enjoy it to the fullest, but our tuning was always outstanding.
You know, One of the reason I stopped trying to change some of her attitude, behaviour, mindset because, I was afraid that the uniqueness she has got would get vanish.
This is also true that I lose the right to open her phone, I lose the right to know what is happening in her life, and I lose the right to be the part of her life.
Everytime, I stopped talking to her before, somewhere I feel like going back but this time, I am not explaining, I am not consoling to her because I am at the edge of my sanity.
I have no anger on her but I dont want to forget that How badly I hated her that day.
I know, I am going to forget the feelings of what she has done to me but I want to remember that I have hated her and I will always hate her.
Cheers,
Swapneswar Barik