When the pursuit of fulfillment ends… “What is it?”

I remember people saying me, ” Why are you leaving every profession when you are doing so well?”

That is true.

I have always jumped from one profession to another.
Because everytime I reach a certain stage it just becomes a repeatative process.

You keep doing it again and again.

There are no uncertainty, no challenge, no excitement.

And I was not ready to settle down.
There was a rush inside of me to look for something that I dont know about.
But I knew for sure this was not it.

Long story short.

A few days ago. I was sitting inside dhynalinga with a singing bowl on my hand offering Nada to the linga and a snake came inside the dome.

All of a sudden the entire crowed jumped up and created chaos inside the dome.

Everyone is scared of snakes, so do I, everyone loves their life, so do I.

But at that moment, I was experiencing something different inside me.

I was so involved in the process of offering that I did not feel like getting up, and kept the offering going.

I was infact ready for the snake bite and was ready for the consequences also. This just did not feel important to me.

An unique sense of devotion blasted inside me making me more compassionate.

I felt weight in my eyelashes and the moment I closed them, two drops of tear rolled over my cheeks and it kept happening once in a few seconds.

I was so still and involved that for a moment I felt like, I just wanted to be seated and let the whole life pass away.

I just wanted to be there, where time was not a parameter of life.

From jumping from one profession to another, to break the monotony of life to setting down doing absolutely nothing in front of Dhynalinga was the transformation that happened to me.

This was the fulfillment i was looking for my whole life.

It just sounds rubbish but the whole time this part of the life was longing to merge in something.

For rest of the time I was very still and settled. There is no more longing.

This life who was restless about something more, something more has come down to certain stillness.

It is very intense yet at ease.

Now, I know for a fact, this is it.


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